Monday, 13 October 2014

A Guide To Selfies

Read this article from collective-evolution.com entitled "Scientists Link Selfies To Narcissism, Addiction & Mental Illness" and then read on to see my illustrated guide to social media selfies.....

the following images are stolen from various similar pages/searches.  I don't know any of these people, but I know a few people like them!

The Duck Face Selfie

Why do they do this? It doesn't make you look sexy, you look fucking ridiculous!

The Gym Selfie 

Just at the gym, I'm working out. See how fit and healthy I look.  I've got my headphones plugged into my phone because I'm just listening to music and everyone in the gym won't notice that I'm not really looking through my music but I've actually been on my phone camera perfecting this selfie in the mirror for the last 5 minutes.

Pet Selfie

Here's a photo of my pet dog.....
 but I think I'll be in this one too..... and I'll do that duck face thing..... 
.....get out of the way dog

Cleavage selfie

Just taking a selfie, didn't even realise my beautiful breasts were in shot actually but if you want to comment on how hot I look then I'll click like on your comment and reply with "awwww thanks hun" as if I wasn't expecting any compliments.

Serious Selfie

Please notice that I am on an airplane.  Please think I look manly and handsome.  Trying extremely hard to look casual and understated because I am so unconcerned with my appearance that nobody will know that this is the 23rd version of this photo.

Car Selfie

Just got in the car and before I think about driving anywhere I thought I may as well take a photo of myself


I've got muscles selfie

slightly different from the gym selfie, he's worked hard to get this 6 pack and there's no way that you're not going to know about it.  Look at me! Just look at me!

Mirror selfie

A selfie in the mirror not only enables a full length 'outfit selfie' which is standard before a night out but you also have an opportunity to show everyone your new phone
mirror selfie
outfit selfie

Hospital selfie

this one's a rare treat.
 I'm in such a bad way, look I'm in hospital, what on earth could have happened to me???  
extra points for visible tubes, cuts and bandages.

The Look where I am Selfie

look where I am! yeah! I'm on holiday and it's somewhere you've never been to!  
erm... yeh okay I've probably done a few of these at some point.  Here's me trekking in NEPAL, did you hear me? I said NEPAL!

The I didn't take this selfie

Yep your asleep and totally unaware that this photo was being taken

The Total Slut Selfie

completely shameless

The blurry selfie

really, what is the point

The fair enough selfie

Sometimes you just have to admit that yes! fair enough, that is absolutely bloody brilliant!

2 comments:

R.O.B said...

It seems a large percentage of people are unlocking the narcissism inside themselves. was it already inside them or are they being conditioned? what does it mean for the future if more people are self obsessed? Will it get worse or balance itself out?

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